People. In all of our crazy choices, daily frustrations, and opinions a dime a dozen, we just can't seem to live with them. The real truth is that we also can't live without them. Our bodies just aren't made to do it.
Over the next couple of weeks, we'll be taking a look at three separate questions:
"Seek and you will find", the Bible says in the book of Matthew, but where do humans find God at the beginning? A scientist by the name of Donald Winnicott, a well known contributor to the fields of pediatrics and psychology, had something to say about that. He promoted the idea that when we bond with our children, we're “giving back to the baby, the baby’s own self."
In straightforward terms, Babies have no idea of who they are.
They rely on caregivers to show them. Infants have to interact with others to receive nourishment to develop into healthy children. Human touch and facial expressions literally grow the infant brain. Those of you who've witnessed the challenges in orphanages understand this all too well.
Our sense of worth is developed and reaffirmed one experience at a time, beginning at birth. Those experiences change the structure of the brain.
In fact, we're so divinely connected to one another, that our ability to keep peaceful hearts helps to calm the bodies of those around us as well. That's crazy! Simply lounging in a chair tunes us in to the well-being of the person sitting next to us. Our "human radar" senses anxiety or calm, distrust or safety. Science calls that phenomenon "psychobiologically attuned attachment communications".
I call Him, Holy Spirit.
Whether or not we fully grasp the ways God has knit us together biologically, we can be sure that our very existence on this earth affects the lives of others. We're wired for good relationships. Our struggles only come when we allow wounds to create barriers to connecting with one another. Talk about a living, breathing, and connected body of Christ!
The minute we realize we're not built for isolation, we're on our way to understanding Jesus' love for the collective church.
Do we always get it right? Absolutely not. Bonnie Badenoch, an author and speaker, quoted this at a recent seminar, "33% of the time, we get attachment (to one another) right. The rest of the time is spent repairing rupture."
Even the best communicators have to say "sorry". That should give hope to all the rest of us. Next week we'll talk about being "Wired to Forgive." I hope to see you back.
Questions to Ponder:
"If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." 1 Cor. 12:26-27
Badenoch, Bonnie (2014). The Interpersonal Neurobiology of Trauma [Lecture]. http://www.nurturingtheheart.com
Shore, A.N. (2001). Effects of secure attachment relationship on right brain development, affect regulation, and infant mental health. Infant Mental Health Journal, 22, pgs. 19-20
Photo Credit: Christian Battaglia
M.S. in Marriage and Family Therapy. Earns Crossfit participation trophies. Disaster cook. Enthusiastic wife. #Boymom. Clutches her faith, not her pearls.