The noise is so loud and so unrelenting that there's really nothing to do but to retreat inside myself. I can't think about what will happen if I don't, I only understand that I need to do it. The older picks on the younger. The younger is crying and he's been sick for the past week. I haven't slept in days and though it's 6pm, I'm still wearing the pajamas I woke up in this morning. I envision myself screaming unspeakable things at my kids...things I could never take back. Not acceptable; so instead, I shut down and go through the motions.
"He said WHAT?", I questioned back. Arms crossed in an "I dare you" stance, I wait for the reply.
Mischief dances in his voice and my husband repeats himself. "The guy told me, 'Thanks for all of your help. If your wife ever needs anything, like breast implants or liposuction, I'm your man.' Then the he nodded like it was a really great offer."
Have you ever been called out? Ouch! Me too. Not one time, in that particular moment, have I been excited to hear, "you should be doing that better, or maybe even something completely different." In the moment, it stung. As time passed, I usually found the feedback to be both useful and true, but that didn't change the fact that it was uncomfortable!
We live in a strange world.
Lord have mercy and bring the tub of ice cream, we females cycle throughout our lives in the area of confidence. While some days we are luxurious and oblivious know-it-alls, the very next day our superhero, hormonal abilities assist us to morph into insecure, judgy messes. I will be the first to admit that I can go "glum" and downright short-sighted in my vision when I believe that my performance has fallen short of expectations.
M.S. in Marriage and Family Therapy. Earns Crossfit participation trophies. Disaster cook. Enthusiastic wife. #Boymom. Clutches her faith, not her pearls.